My dad recently said to me: "Tolerance is the virtue of those who believe in nothing."

Let me put it into context for you: He challenged me to a debate on gay marriages. Here is my first arguement:

"On Jul 10, 2006, at 6:04 PM, Greta Mayer wrote:
Here's the thing: This is inevitably going to be a religious discussion. You are going to quote a verse from the bible where it says that homosexuality is wrong. and then i am going to point out that the bible was written hundreds of years ago by MAN, and i think this is where the thing will end. We have differing opinions on your source. I think it is a wonderful story, full of good analogies, and symbolism, and it contains some great morals and ethics to use as a basis, but i do not believe the bible is a manual for life as your church tell you so. I can't see as to how God would care who we choose to (or not choose to) love. Why would that matter to him? Why would that matter to you? Marriage is nothing like murder, and you can't even compare them. If your actions do not affect anyone else, not the case with murder, then so what? Who cares what they do as long as they are not affecting you? It is their choice to disobey the "word of god", and accept any consequences that might incur from that choice. He gave us free will, after all, did he not? Is it your job to save the world? This action does not affect anyone else and that is my first argument.
My second is that under god all people are equal and deserve the same treatment. Of course it is the christians that are the first to scream hateful things while you walk down Bourbon st. during Mardi Gras. Or bomb the abortion clinics, or hold rallies condemning parents in front of children who don't understand why those people hate them. I'm not saying everyone is like this, I'm saying it's easy to pick out these people because they give a bad name to Christians everywhere and I think Jesus would be ashamed of them. But they exist and I'm sick and tired of all the blood that has been shed in Christ's name. In all of his names. All people are created equal and deserve the same rights. It's about equality. Thirdly, with everything that is going on in the world today, are there not better things for us to worry about? We are at war, global warming is destroying the planet, and the government is at it's most chaotic, idiotic, un-governing state ever. I believe that this is arising as an issue to take the focus off of what is really going on, as is immigration. I don't let the government tell me what is important to me, I don't trust them at all. Although it seems i have already made your argument for you, I am interested in what you will counter with. I can see you discussing this as dinner table fodder...wait, scratch that. I am not sure your "Pollyanna" would let you. ooh, i am so mean! I warned you not to discuss this with me, it is one of my favorite causes.
Debate away!"

Ok now this is his first rebuttal:

"On 10/07/2006, at 21:28, Richard Mayer wrote:
O.K. Lesson 1 Never NEVER challenge a writer to a written debate.
How's this . . . Tolerance is the virtue of those who believe in nothing. Rather than stand up for what is right (or wrong) the voice of tolerance says we should just let everyone "be". That we will understand each other and understand each others beliefs and cultures if we accept them as they are. I can buy that concept to a point. The question is . . . where do you draw the line? Is it hypocritical for someone to hate when a Christian tries to force his faith on one but he doesn't mind cramming tolerance down everyone else's throat?
What do you call a philosophy that forcefully and consistently violates its own central pillar of belief? In conclusion: All actions effect all things."

And me again:

On Jul 11, 2006, at 6:30 PM, Greta Mayer wrote:
"That is crazy. You're speaking about tolerance like it's a bad thing. Like it is the easy way out. It sounds a little like the propaganda of the Nazi party. Jews are wrong in their opinion, any one not of aryan descent is an abomination. So, rather than just be tolerant and let everyone "be", they decide to kill them all. Yes that is the extreme but it applies to an extent. It is human nature to fight amongst each other and separate ourselves. Tolerance and peace is what Jesus Christ preached. Are you saying he's wrong? You draw the line when your actions effect someone else's quality of life. i think. Yes all actions effect all things, but you can't control the world. A butterfly halfway around the world can flap it's wings and cause a devastating hurricane. That is the nature of the beast. You succeed when you can rise above the winds and make lemonade from trampled soybean crops. When you can live true to yourself in the midst of all the chaos and opposition. That takes courage. No, it is not hypocritical. When one party is being hateful, and the other party is being peaceful. How is that hypocritical? I don't know. What do you call that philosophy? Catholicism? "

And him:

"O.K. - I meant "you win" with the first sentence of my reply (see Lesson 1) Tolerance of wrong behavior IS a bad thing. If you have a friend that is seeing another one of your friends' girlfriend on the side, is it right because it feels right to him? Do you tolerate the behavior because it isn't hurting anyone? The Hitler analogy is extreme but you actually make my point as well as yours. The only reason Hitler was able to gain power and then use that power to his mis-guided ends was because NO one was willing to stand-up and say it was wrong. The German population was just busy trying "to get along with each other" and the rest of Europe. They tolerated him until it was too late. It's easy to tolerate. What takes courage is actually standing up for what's right and against what's wrong. Your friend may tell you to bug off. Or look at you like your crazy. But in his heart he knows what he's doing is wrong and he may just thank you for being a friend."

Then I said something like what the German people's problem really was...a poor economy and no leadership, and someother stellar arugements (i'll post them when i find them) and then he basically quit.
So as punishment for losing the debate, I sent him a petition to sign and return to his congressman saying he opposed the FMA (Federal Marriage Ammendment) and discrimination in the constitution(which he never signed, by the way). Being that he just gave up, I am still open for debate. Thank you for playing.

10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Why Nutcrackers Are So Ugly

I'm sick of Christmas. But there's one thing I'm not sick of: The Nutcracker.
So in honor of that, I've decided to tell you the story of how the nutcracker came to be. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I'm doing this entirely from memory so there may be inconsistencies. In other words, it's my favorite childhood story so sue me if I get it a little skewed.

Long ago, in a kingdom not too far from our own, there lived a king and queen. The queen gave birth to a beautiful princess and they named her Pirlipat. But the queen feared another queen who lived in the castle, the queen of mice. So she had princess pirlipat's cradle guarded by six cats and six nurses. Well one night all six nurses and all six cats fell asleep and were awoken by the cries of the infant princess, just in time to see the queen of mice leap from the cradle and disappear through a crack in the floorboards. They rushed to the cradle but leapt back when what they saw inside made them turn back in horror. The princesses beautiful blue eyes now bulged out in a glassy green and were much too large for her own head. Her pink lips were a mouth that stretched from ear to ear and her teeth, large and square.
The king and queen tried everything to restore the princesses former beauty to no avail. At last they had the court astronomer draw up her horoscope and it was discovered that the curse could only be broken, if Pirlipat swallowed a rare nut known as the Krakatuk. Moreover, the nut had to be cracked by a young man who had never shaved and had always worn boots.
The king bade the astronomer to find the krakatuk or face death, but after traveling the length and breadth of asia and africa he concluded the search was hopeless. On his way back to accept his fate, he made a stop in Nuremburg to visit his brother who was a local toy maker there. "What luck you stopped to see me" his brother cried in delight. "I have the krakatuk. And the young man who can crack it!" He went in the back and returned with a small, dark nut whose shell was incredibly tough and engraved on it was the word krakatuk. The toy maker then called for his nephew, Christian Elias Drosselmeier, whose cheeks were rosy and smooth and who had teeth as hard as steel.
Back at the palace, Drosselmeier was led into the princesses chamber who by now was a young woman and placed the krakatuk in his mouth and crack, crack, shattered the shell into tiny pieces. The princess swallowed the kernel and marvel upon marvels was transformed to her former miraculous self with golden hair, twinkling blue eyes and perfect pink lips. As payment, the astronomer was spared his life and Drosselmeier was offered the princesses hand in marriage but as he took a step back, he brought his left bootheel squarely down upon the queen of mice. Now Drosselmeiers features were transformed to the glassy green eyes, protruding jaw, gaping mouth, and large head. To which the princess reacted "marry that ugly nutcracker? No way!". As the queen of mice lay dying on the floor she uttered her final words: "My newborn son, with seven crowns shall bring the master cracker down. His mothers death he will repay beware nutcracker that fated daaayyyy!" And so the astronomer and his nephew were banished from the kingdom. But before they were, the astronomer was able to discover that his nephews curse could only be broken if he defeated the queen of mice's' son and earned the love of a woman in return. And that, my dear, is the story of why nutcrackers are so ugly.


Disclaimer two: I am reciting this, as said before, from memory. And that comes from the Hoffman story audio version narrated by Claire Bloom. Hence the expressive nature of some of the words.

Where will you go when you die?

How often do you think about death? Are you good or bad? Surely, it cannot be this easy. No one is entirely good and no one is entirely bad. It baffles me how within the same religion, there can be so many varying opinions for what constitutes a ticket to heaven. Heaven, hell, purgatory, the happy hunting grounds, reincarnation, nowhere. There are many varying opinions on this topic. And we could debate this for all eternity but the simple truth is this: I don't know. Neither do you. No one does. We can believe whatever we want. (be·lieve- to be of the opinion that something exists or is a reality, especially when there is no absolute proof of its existence or reality.) Belief is a powerful thing because it's rooted in your mind and therein lies the real power. In your mind. Can you create your own heaven? What would yours look like? That's a pretty revealing experiement, as it turns out.

I could find heaven in many different places. On a small screened in porch near the ocean, on the banks of the Mississippi at sunset, in the arms of a lover, way above the universe watching it unfold, on a comfy couch with a good book, a warm blanket, and a couple kitties in my lap, dancing with my friend Jennifer, or anywhere where there is no fridge buzz. I'm not picky.


I found this. It's not mine. I did not write it. But I liked it. I thought it eloquent and it rang true to me so I'm sharing it with you: "It is ingrained in our minds to be myth makers. When we focus on what we believe spiritually we are then faced with more blood flow to the frontal lobes of the brain. Sometimes with this much blood flow and connection of neurotransmitters creates a solid connection between left and right. There is a decreased flow however, to the parietal lobes which is where our sense of orientation in space and time lies. Through history when man was faced with something he could not explain it became magic or sent from heaven. Well then what was heaven or this magic? We then start to do what we do best. We think and ponder what if. Then we take what is the most logical at that time and run with it. As we start to pass this down, the generation gaps, one word becomes ten. And Gods die. A creative story is now made from a complex mind, the collective conscious throughout humankind history. There is an energy in all things, even inanimate objects. Science teaches this as atoms. In order to have a conscious mind you need conscious energy. I think when we die our energy is released into everything and only certain conscious energy can find a path to another outlet. We are not brought back as one hole only bits and pieces of imprints. But our real conscious mind is dead and not coming back. If you are a buyer of a myth then you will dream off into that until there is no more activity from the cerebral cortex. Thus being at peace with your own God. I think to totally bring back those imprints is to focus your whole life with practice and dedication to thinking about these myths."

People invent an idea, a belief. They tell it to others, they teach their children. The generations evolve, so does the story, Words become lost, or added or whatnot. Gods are born, gods die. But the world keeps turning. The mind is a powerful, powerful thing.

Fun With a New Camera

Movies Anyone?

Jagshemash, I like you! Do you like me? Oh Borat. You know we love you.


This looks interesting...


Do you have any suggestions? Don't even say synecdoche, new york. I'm waiting to see.

New Rules from my hero

So my cable is messed up and I can't finish the documentary. In lieu of that, something lighter:
New Rules from 'Real Time with Bill Maher". (Sometimes, i miss the X-Files, but I NEVER miss Real Time.)

New Rule: It's not a freak accident when a stingray stings someone. It's called a "stingray," not a "hugray" or a "kissray." A "stingray." It's not at the bottom of the ocean thinking, "I wish an Australian with a cable show would rub on me." Swimming next to one is like hunting duck with Dick Cheney or marrying Robert Blake.


New Rule: Confessed child murderers have to fly coach. Of all the people who ever deserved to spend 14 hours listening to a crying baby and having his seat kicked- -number one has got to be that guy.







New Rule: If turning on my cell phone can bring down your commercial airliner, build a better plane. Right? I mean, the number of people who carry hand-held electrical devices these days equals the number of people who have hands. To give them all veto power over whether the other passengers live or die seems like a flaw in the system.




New Rule: Don't blame illegal immigrants for driving down wages. Blame Congress. Republicans in Congress have to stop saying that the problem with Mexicans coming over the border is they keep wages down. You know what keeps wages down? The fact that Congress hasn't raised the minimum wage since 1997. 1997, when my dealer still had a beeper! Car dealer, car dealer, what did I say?






New Rule: Nobody can use the phrase "our greatest problem" anymore unless you're talking about global warming. President Bush has been saying we're in a war on terror, and now I get it. He's not saying "terror," he's saying "terra" as in "terra firma," as in the Earth. George Bush is an alien sent here to destroy the Earth! I know it sounds crazy, but it made perfect sense when Tom Cruise explained it to me last week.





New Rule: When President Bush meets an autistic teenager, they must wear name tags so we can tell them apart.







New Rule: If you're too lazy to peel your own fruit, get scurvy and die! Hoping to appeal to teenagers who say they're too busy to peel oranges, Sunkist is introducing a new pre-cut, pre-peeled snack version. Not to be outdone, Baskin-Robbins has created a new cone-less ice cream that your mother pre-chews and spits down your throat.(This one nearly made me wet myself)








New Rule: Bluetooth headset users have to do something that lets me know you're just on the phone and not a dangerous schizophrenic. Right? We don't know if you're talking to your secretary or the evil leprechaun who lives in your head. You're not the chief communications officer of the Starship Enterprise. You're a shoe salesman asking your mom if you can bring over your laundry. If I wanted to overhear every tedious scrap of brain static rattling around in your head, I'd read your blog.







New Rule: Let Britney be Britney. Darwin's survival of the fittest depends on hillbillies being left alone to do stupid hillbilly things. Like sticking forks in toasters and leaving babies in front seats, and going hunting with Dick Cheney. She's Britney Spears. Of course, she's going to drive with the baby on her lap. We're just lucky she didn't it mixed up with an empty and throw it out the window.






New Rule: Stop worrying that the government is listening in on your phone conversation. The person you called isn't even listening to your phone conversation. Any American in this day and age who thinks they're not being monitored is so naive and oblivious, I can't believe they're not working already for the Bush Administration.






New Rule: Consenting adults, not governments, must be the ones to decide what constitutes a marriage.












And finally, New Rule: George Bush has to stop laughing at himself. When you're incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn't cute or funny. You know, there's a guy who's been running around the country pretending he's the president, and I believe his name is George Bush. And he wants everyone to know that he doesn't take himself too seriously. Which is working out great, because now nobody else in the world does either.

You know, if the Republicans really want to joke around, I've got one for you. Knock, knock.

AUDIENCE: Who's there?

MAHER: Hillary.

When The Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts and/or Impeach the President!

"Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes." -Zig Ziglar


Having watched the first two acts of Spike Lee’s scorching documentary When The Levees Broke, I feel obligated, as a professional writer, dreamer, and free-thinker to comment. Let’s talk first about the movie itself. I feel the movie was pretty accurate. I am overjoyed that Spike documented the inaccuracy of the media. Rumors were rampant at this time and most of the mainstream media, in their sensationalist, nearly fanatical, train-wreck loving selves did nothing to help these rumors. If you have not seen the movie, I would like to reaffirm the FACT that there were no rapes, no hostage situations, and no jailbreaks during the days after the storm. Some people in the lower ninth ward were quoted as hearing loud explosion sounds right before the levee broke. I will discuss this more in depth later but I do believe this to be a rumor; one of ignorant minded people. The looting is half-justified because half the people (perhaps more) were taking what they needed to survive, i.e. food, clothing, diapers, water. The other stupid half exists in every city in every country in the world. Stupidity is not unique to the New Orleans area. According to Lee, the looting got out of hand because our law enforcement officials were tied up in the rescue efforts. Which brings to me my next, very controversial point.

Despite how cold-hearted this makes me sound, I have a problem with those that did not evacuate. Here is the core issue with me. When you were told this was a mandatory evacuation, when Mayor Nagin called the press conference and announced it, he clearly said that if you chose to stay, you would not receive help. Now, all hell breaks loose and you demand help even though you were all too aware that you were not promised any. Disinterested presidents, and purely symbolic government agencies aside, you have two feet don’t you? (I’m not speaking of the sick, elderly, and incapacitated here.) You have two feet, pack you a backpack and start walking! I realize how harsh that sounds but consider the alternative. You can both suffer in the heat and escape with your life, or you can die. It angers me to see these people standing outside the Superdome, suffering, miserable, starving, dying and screaming for help. Its even more heart breaking to know that those are your neighbors. I simply have a problem feeling sympathy for those who ignored the imminent threat, chose to stay fully knowing they would not receive help and then acted like something was taken from them. That’s pretty much all I have the balls to say on that issue right now. Truthfully, I am not convinced by my own argument. I just felt it needed to be said. You had a choice. Suffer or die. You made your bed.


I hate how everyone tries to point the finger at someone else. Nagin points at Blanco, Blanco points at Bush, Bush points at his intelligence community and then we have FEMA. In Post-Katrina New Orleans, FEMA is a dirty, four-letter word so I don’t even want to talk about it. If there is blame, it is akin to who is responsible for 9/11. Everyone must take some. Everyone. The real crime here is not the government, who, let’s face it, had always been redundant and unable. The real crime here is the poverty level. Even before the storm, we called our city a third world country. (Now we say fourth or fifth) The real travesty to the American people is that we let these people live in these conditions in what was supposedly the richest country in the history of the world. Now, I flip flop on this issue a lot. I see both sides of the story in that; the wealthiest people have worked very hard to ensure their survival and that of their offspring. They worked hard for their money and they deserve to keep it. But it doesn’t seem right to have the most affluent people, living virtually next to some of the poorest. I don’t know if anyone can understand the conditions in which they were living. Is it the governments’ responsibility to provide for those who cant provide for themselves? If so, then it seems that the entire capitalist economy is moot. Why should anyone work for anything when the government will provide it for me? It almost makes me want to move to Canada. The point is I’m tired of hearing the ‘it’s their fault’ game. So shut up and take it like a man. Even at the bottom level, you and I must take some of that responsibility. I will if you, Ray Nagin, will. Actually, forget the level of poverty. Forget all that. The real blame lies with the Army Corps of Engineers. Yes, I said it. Ask any New Orleanian, and they will echo my sentiments. Who else could get away with building sub-standard levees in the country’s most vulnerable city? And now we want the same agency to rebuild the levees? Screw that. Fire them and hire someone else. The storm missed us! Do people even know that? The storm is not what hit us. Those levees were not built to withstand even category one forces. That is why the documentary is aptly named. Think about that for a minute.


Next I would like to discuss the racial issue. I am sick and tired of hearing ignorant people try to pull the race card. Yes, you too Kanye West. You never hear white people say “yeah, the helicopters flew over but they did not stop to rescue me. They were probably on their way to pick up some Asian people.” For those of you, who think this is a race issue, let me remind you that 80% of the city was under water. Lakeview, the Lower Ninth Ward, St. Bernard Parish, New Orleans East, and parts of Metairie, and Uptown to name a few. Does everybody know that the pumps were flooded as well? This is part of the reason why it took so long for the floodwaters to recede. If you’ll remember earlier I said something about the alleged explosion in the lower ninth. Quit crying! Nobody blew up your levees. What you heard might have been a crack in the flimsy concrete giving way to the force of the water behind it. You may have heard the barge hitting the levee. Some people believe that is what broke that particular levee. I am a firm believer that if you look hard enough, you can make a connection into anything. This not a race issue, this is a human issue. As I have said before, race does not exist. Quit giving it power by affirming it and blaming all your troubles on it. Bill Maher said New Orleans is everything Republicans hate. It’s black, sexy, French, and liberated. I’m not sure what that has to do with my point, I just liked it. Why would anyone who cared enough to come help, care whether you are white or black or yellow or red or brown? I would like to hear from anyone who was denied rescue or shelter because of his or her skin color. It’s an easy scapegoat and it’s simply untrue.

Also, and quickly because this is getting too long. Stop comparing Katrina to 9/11. That means you too, Ray Nagin. These comparisons are simply unjust. Ground Zero is 16 square acres; New Orleans is approximately 90,000 square miles. It’s like comparing apples to cat poop.

And, if you remember earlier this year, the National Guard was brought into the city to keep the peace in what many New Orleanians deem a knee-jerk reaction to a rising crime rate. I don’t see how they could get them here so soon for a peace keeping mission, and it took them FIVE DAYS to get here after the storm. Yes, clearly the ball was dropped. In Indonesia, after the tidal wave, there were massive food drops two days after the damage occurred. Why in our own country did it take so long? Bush says he was unaware, yet the day before the storm, he is on television warning about the dangers of such a strong storm hitting the city. And then we see him in San Francisco, giving a speech about Iraq (now it becomes clear, what really matters: cleaning up someone’s else’s country). Condoleezza Rice is shopping, and hitting tennis balls with Monica Seles while these people are suffering. I want this man impeached. I want his cabinet removed from office. These people should be ashamed of themselves, but I’m realistic. I realize that heart is too much to ask for in a politician. I can only hope that he is assassinated.


Hope. That’s an interesting idea. Despite all the points and counter-points and times I have contradicted myself, I still have hope. I think that’s all any of us can have. It’s pretty much all we do have. We hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Now that’s a good lesson. Next time, I hope you all will leave and bring all your irreplaceable possessions with you. I hope the residents of the lower ninth get their clean drinking water soon. I hope all of you living in the rest of the country realize that you have to grain of salt everything, even me. I hope we have learned from our mistakes. I know we will rebuild, despite some people’s asinine opinions that we should not. I know New Orleans will return.

I cannot end this without giving thanks and credit to the people who really came through for the city of New Orleans. People like the U.S. Coast Guard, the Canadian Mounties, the Cajun Navy, i.e. the residents who saved each other, Sean Penn, and my cousin David Ferris. Now, I do not believe heroes exist. We all have the ability within us to do heroic things. But if they did, these are the people who would most likely come close. You serve as role models for the rest of us, present company included, who are all theory and no action. Is the pen truly mightier than the sword?

Post Script: When I finish the other two acts, I might add more...

The Children Of The Revolution Are Here

King George III was the king of England in 1776. He kept a journal. The entry dated July 4th 1776 read, "Nothing important happened today." The point is, the revolution has started. Things that change the world forever are happening and even kings can miss them if they're not paying attention.
So stop telling me I think too much. I'm sick of hearing it. If I wasn't interested in this, I wouldn't be asking the questions, ok? ok.


More thoughts: Added September 16, 2006. 3:04pm
What is prayer? Why is that so important to God? Why is it necessary? In order to answer this, I think we need to understand what the purpose of God is. What is his intent? And why is prayer so important to this intent? How would prayer help god serve his purpose?
Good and evil. Does it really exist? Why do we deem something evil? Because it evokes a sensation, a mostly unpleasant one. Why do we consider murder evil? Because it frightens us. Because we associate it with pain, or with loss. But is there really a fundamental moral code? Some people do not consider it evil. Some serial killers do not view their actions as evil. They only know it’s bad because they’ve been taught that. From a purely animalistic standpoint, we would be frightened of pain because it could lead to death and does not promote the continuation of the species. It is only our conscious minds, our ability for higher thought that terms something good or evil. Religious believers may or may not agree. But regardless of the fact, the words good and evil make no difference to the grand scheme of the universe. Why is something bad? Why is something good? The experience is only an experience. We put the label on it. To help us understand it better.
Race does not exist. It was invented by man to further separate ourselves. All members of the human race share 98% of their genes. The differences in appearance and skin color are due mostly to our environment; some may be due to genetic mutations. But Carl Linnaeus might have contributed to the concept of race to prove that some species are subspecies of others. And yes, this seems lie a clear effort to justify slavery. But scientifically there is no proof of any difference between humans. We are all the same. We have created this monster and given it power by submitting to the meaning. The way we separate ourselves came about by our fears of the unknown. I believe it comes from the ancient times when an outsider, or a non-family or tribe member might have wanted to do you harm. It is certainly possible for an outsider to want to do you more harm than a family member. So, skin color is a fact. We are different colors but race is an illusion.


And from Bill Maher:
"How come, when things go well, it's "Hallelujah!" But when they go bad, it's still, "Hallelujah!"? People can endure an endless series of Job-like hardships: their house is shredded by a tornado, their car is in a tree, the family is wiped out... "But God spared my ceramic lawn deer, thank you, Jesus!"
And we put the blame on ourselves, and say that whatever cruel, random crap happened to us happened because "God works in mysterious ways...too mysterious for stupid me to understand."
Well, sorry, but I think a little more of myself and my fellow humans than that. I don't know the answers to the big cosmic questions. No one does. But I do know there's no reason for a cleft lip or a mine collapsing, or all that traffic on the 101.
Mysterious ways? You know what else works in mysterious ways? A microwave. It stays cool but the food gets hot! It's a mystery! Let's worship it. No, let's not. Let's not thank God for His mercy or blame Him when you die from eating bad spinach. On the fifth anniversary of the national day of prayer and remembrance, let's put the blame for September 11th squarely where it belongs: on our new enemy, Iran. The bombing starts three weeks before the mid-terms, God willing."

Standby for technical difficulties

Please bear with me. I am in the process of Deconstructing. That means taking everything I thought I already knew about life and the universe, disassembeling it and re-examining it. Hopefully later, I will be able to put those pieces back together in a process we will tentativley call Reconstruction (clever, i know). You may call this a philosophical kick, a passing phase, or what you want but the truth of the matter is I don't know exactly what it is that i believe. I wish these questions had answers. Maybe you know more than me or you think you do anyways so I'll pose them to you.

1. Why do people seek meaning and purpose? Why would evolution have given us this need for purpose?
2. What the hell is dark matter/energy? Seriously...
3. Why do we need leap years and what would happen if we didn't have them?
4. What are dimensions? What are they made of? How many are there? Why do they exist?
5. Exactly how does the brain use electricty and chemistry to communicate thoughts?
6. Why do we have the capacity for emotions? From an evolutionary standpoint, they are wasted resources since animals dont have them...or do they?
7. If the universe and/or things in it were formed by chance, why should the behavior of the universe be predictable instead of random?
8. Is beauty an illusion? Are emotions? Technically speaking they are just chemical or electrical impulses from the brain, right? is the rest in our head?
9. When someone is testifying, and they're asked "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?"....what happens if someone says "No"?
10. Are there undiscovered laws of nature? We keep discovering new viruses and diseases, so is there room for more discoveries in other areas? Or do we already know everything there is to know about nature?
11. Someone please explain the String Theory to me. We are all made of strings?
12. What are neutrinos and do they have mass?
13. What is the universe made of?
14. How do neuro-networks create consciousness?
15. How does the human brain process two dimensional retinal images into the 3-D phenomenon?

"Your scientific illiteracy makes me shudder", as the man in black said in one of my favorite X-Files episodes.
I realize that most of these questions are unanswerable. But I am open to all possible explanations and answers. You know what I'm looking for. Give me something to think about. I'll try to pay attention. Thank you for your patience.

This is the sum of our ambition

It is undeniable that the Big Bang theory lacks something explanatory. Unless existence/the universe is infinite, has always existed and always will exist, then everything has a beginning and an end. Nature seems to suggest that nothing is infinite. Everything has a start and an end. So what caused the Big Bang? Did everything come from a piece of matter smaller than an atom, but denser than all the matter in the known universe? Then, where did that piece come from? And what caused the "explosion"? And if the universe is finite, what is beyond it?

With all the advances in science, it seems like theologists are scrambling to come up with an explanation. But I am not necessarily convinced from your ability to merely quote scripture. I reject your refusal to ask and answer the questions simply because you offer the simple answer of "it is and always has been" and you think a two-thousand year old book written by man is satisfactory in proving this. Are science and religion opposites? Or are they merely two means to the same end? Are there any true opposites? Is everything the same? If we all came from one piece of matter, from one single celled organism in the sea, then how can everything be so different? What is space made of? How can there truly be nothing? If two identical particles can exist at the same time, in different locations, then what does that mean? What is the practical application of quantum mechanics? Is morality simply the invention of man? Is there really good and evil? Does each individual measure right and wrong according to their own culture and upbringing, or is there an absolute standard of moral value? It seems as if it would be everything or nothing and not much room in between. But what if it was both? What if at the same time, everything was connected and nothing meant anything? Purely because we are believe it to be so.

In ancient times, men sought to explain what they couldn't and they came up with God or Gods or Goddesses. Now, in our advanced times, science can do most of the explaining. But this does not disprove the idea that a higher power might have had a hand in creating these processes, right? What is death and why are we so fearful of it? Can we ascend it? I'm not even going to think about asking what the meaning of life is because I'm not entirely sure that is not a rhetorical question. What is consciousness? What role does it play? How did it arise? Do animals have this? Do animals have a soul? If they do, then eating meat is murder, no? If the body is this glorious machine, than who is the pilot? Is our destiny presorted? If everything that can happen, will happen, and has already happened, then where does that leave us? Where does that leave our role? Do we even have a role in determining the direction of our own lives? Do each of us have the power to create our own universes?...wow.

I suppose, in conclusion, these are my beliefs) they are not much different then they were when I was a teenager) I believe in the power of the universe, in an energy that creates, and destroys, and binds us all. I do not think it can be so easily personified as the old bearded man on a throne who cares whether or not you covet your neighbors goods. Or any other deity for that matter. Either answer these questions for me or shut up. In a very Sagan-esque way, show me...then we can talk.


Answers: September 7th: Ok, we are not different. We are the same. God is within us. We are creators. There is no good and evil. I'm still not quite sure on the nothingness/anti/dark matter issue however. But thoughts are powerful and my thighs are actually pretty, but only because i think them to be so...who knew?

Conspiracy Theory #1- Busted

Attention: This theory has been solved. The answer is at the bottom.
"If you want total security, go to prison. There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on. The only thing lacking...is freedom". -Dwight D. Eisenhower-

J. Edgar Hoover once said: “The individual is handicapped by coming face-to-face with a conspiracy so monstrous- he simply cannot believe it exists"
Samuel Clemens said: “I guess the Government that robs its own people, earns the Future it is preparing for Itself”.

These are the results of a days worth of reading i.e. a very boring day at work. Just unanswered questions and dilemas involving what some people are calling "The New Pearl Harbor":

1. How, if no steel-frame building had ever collapsed from fire, did three such edifices fall that day, including 7 World Trade Center, which was not hit by any airplane?
2. And why, if hydrocarbon-fueled fire maxes out at 1,800 degrees Fahrenheit and steel melts at 2,700 degrees, did the towers weaken sufficiently to fall in such a short time—only 56 minutes in the case of the South Tower?
3. And why, if the impact destroyed the planes’ supposedly crash-proof flight-recorder black boxes, was the FBI able to find, in perfect condition, the passport of Satam al Suqami, one of the alleged American Airlines Flight 11 hijackers?
4. And how to explain the nonperformance of the FAA and NORAD?
5. How could they, an hour after the first World Trade Center crash, allow an obviously hostile airplane to smash into the Pentagon, headquarters of the entire military-industrial complex, for chrissakes? And why did the Defense Department choose to stage an extraordinary number of military exercises on 9/11—occupying matériel and spreading confusion about who was who on that day?
6. And why was it so important, as decreed by Mayor Giuliani, to clear away the debris, before all the bodies were recovered?
7. And what about the short-selling spree on American and United airlines stock in the days before the attacks? Betting on the stocks to go down—was this real sicko Wall Street insider trading?
8. And the most important question of all: Why? and perhaps even more importantly, who would benefit from this?



I've read the extensive conspiracy theories on the rate of speed at which the towers fell and the controlled demolition idea.
I've seen the photographs of the pentagon attack and heard the theories concerning the improbability of a commercial jet carrying tons and tons of jet fuel making a relatively small sized hole in the wall of the pentagon. I've read eyewitness reports from people who claim to have been at ground zero as the planes hit and saw hundreds of billions of dollars in gold bricks removed from their safety deposit boxes. People are making connections between the associated risks and costs of the asbestos removal in the towers to the infamous decision made by the terrorists to take a money-losing operation and turn it into a money-making never-ending war. I've heard about a statement made by Donald Rumsfeld on September 10th 2001- wherein he announced that $2.3 trillion dollars in U.S. taxpayer funds had been misappropriated by Pentagon accountants and “lost”. 2.3 TRILLION dollars. Think about it. Do you remember that? Neither do I.
I don't want to fathom that we live in this world, but if all this were true, would I really be surprised? I do not doubt the government's ability or willingness to decieve it's people. Even if our country's founding fathers had good intentions, they knew the golden rule of governing: Power Corrupts. Consider this from Harold Pinter, 2005 nobel prize winner:
"Political language, as used by politicians, does not venture into any of this territory since the majority of politicians, on the evidence available to us, are interested not in truth but in power and in the maintenance of that power. To maintain that power it is essential that people remain in ignorance, that they live in ignorance of the truth, even the truth of their own lives. What surrounds us therefore is a vast tapestry of lies, upon which we feed."

Now what do you think? i'm a little confused.

ANSWER!: (edited) September 13, 2006. 4:09 pm: Ok, you expect me to believe that our government who couldn't get the lights on in Baghda; our government, who couldn't clean up after Katrina, is capable of creating this master planned attack? I dont think so. They are simply not capable. Conspriacy Solved. Myth Busted. Period. Credits for this revelation of sorts go to Joan Walsh, Editor in Chief of Salon.com and Bill Maher. I love you, Bill Maher.

Fiction is nothing but cleverly crafted lies

Truth is stranger than fiction. Yesterday, I saw a one armed man beat up a man with boobs. Today we are learning table manners. Elbows off the table ladies!